Zingle & Mingle

well, i was having deep thoughts the other day trying to decide what do i want and what do i need concerning the issue of any potential engagement
i was analyzing both choices
-staying single:
well alot of girls say the staying single lacks of being independent!
i think its the total opposite staying single is th only way to be independent , uhave ur own life ,interests ,responsibilities as u responsible for none, freedom of choice and its not combined with the partner`s.

plus u will never be ready to start and new family and leave ur family behind,, now u can be there for them when every time they need u of course allah la ei7ejhom la elna :P

in th other hand u`ll lose the chance of being a mom as all girls have (`3arezet el omomeh) .. mmm maybe thinking of adoption?
-getting married
counting days to leaving ur home is something that totally freaks me out
huugeeeee issue

***these are the points that will show u the fact that u r never independent
start living with a total stranger that u met couple of month ago
u `ll be part of this stranger`s family as well
and u`ll have to cope with all that
now u`ll start feeling the winds of change

the idea of never being free again!
after a while u`ll never be 2 again!!
and its goes on and on
what if u start missing ur old life.. ur girly talks with ur friends ,ur girly time ,the time u spend alone
think of it ,, u`ll be living with ur husband for at least 25-30 yearssssssssssssss

now what if!!
what if u couldnt cope with all that!
problems with ur husband ,his family
fights
leaving home


i dont know what do i wnat!

Six Months and I am still not over you ..

As of today's afternoon it will be six months since you left. Since you left me without a warning and for what? For a silly reason that is not worth talking about. Was our love so fragile? At the beginning I felt like I can just put you out of my mind, and start going out and dating again. I thought I would replace you in a blink of an eye and I thought I could get over you in a day or two. But I was so wrong.



Six moths has passed and still cant take you out of my mind and out of my heart. I thought by now that you would have been completely forgotten and replaced. Little I knew that now after all these months the hurt became more real. Now I came out of my denial to your abandonment of me and out love. Now the hurt is more real, more felt and more painful.

Maltoosh menAwsom guy

thank You

I feel the emptiness in me bigger than ever, I feel this big void that you left in my life. I feel I am loveless and incapable of falling in love again. How can I fall in love when every minute of every waking hour I am thinking of you? How can I get over you when you are running in my blood and in my system? How can I forget you while I still remember each word we said to each other?



Now more than ever I feel I need you so badly, I need to hear your voice once more I need to look into your eyes. How could you have done that to me? This question I never asked before because I did not care to know why, but now it is living inside me. How could you have left me? Was I living an illusion? Was it just a good time you were spending with me? I feel like I just have been used. There is one line in one song that is stuck in my head "Take me back in time maybe I can forget. Turn in different corner and we never would have met.. Would you care?"



How dare you do that to me? I am out of my denial and in my anger toward you and toward myself. All my life I have never let anyone so close to my heart because I was afraid of being vulnerable and submissive to her heart, and eventually get hurt. Why did I pull down my guard and broke my wall and ran over my pride and surrendered my heart to you so you could step all over it and tearing it apart killing me and what could have been my only chance on love and life.. leaving me just shattered memories of what used to be a full man.



How could you do that to me? How could you make me feel this lost inside? Six months have passed and the pain is still their. The longing for you has increased; I just can't stop thinking about you and can't stop waiting for you to call me once more. I am willing to give it all up for one word from you. Six months have passed and I am dying in them 100 times a-day.



For the next six months I will survive you and I will get over you and I will replace you and never looking back. I swear on everything that was between us that there will come a day when you will come back to me asking for my forgiveness and love again and I will never take you back. I will make you cry and I will make you beg and I will watch you bleed while I am feeling no mercy for you. What we had was the best that you could ever have and the best that anyone will ever give you. But you lost it all and some people just don’t deserve good things in life.

Again

Again it's you calling my name .. telling me miss you and where have u been
There's too much to say clouds of words so gray , I've been away stealing rain and sway
Dancing under the moon light what to tell you how to start ..
Disguising my self with thoughtless way escaping from you hesitated before going ray
Wish I can tell you about my heart secrets wish you to stay
Wish I can take off my mask and now it's becoming a task
Will you accept me for who I am or harvest my sin with blinded mind
Another day has just begun with growing blames shooting me as a gun
Tell me who I am?? Tell me I am not a lie.. free my soul never tie
Speechless me cant go on told ya I'll be there waiting your call.. god forgive me im just hollow soul
Again it's me calling your name , telling you how I miss you and sorry I couldn't be there ..

blueeeeyy thanx a agian

once upon time (in amman)

Never ending words, never lasting love, never be here waiting you to be near
It’s a long story talking about that glory obscured with love and pain
Once upon time there was me and u were mine I remember that day but now it's so far
Holding those passions waiting so anxious, fighting those illusions feared the dark
The pain grew stronger the night slipped with that hunger
It's the darkness, turning my life seasons to shade, wondering soul waiting for integrity
Standing there watching your traces I tried to follow before it's too late
Just like magic it's all avoiding left me in this journey like ancient ruins
That was my story once upon time there were you but no longer mine …


thank u blue

Dedicated to ou Beloved!

في الضفة لي أطفال سبعة أصغرهم يرضع تاريخه
أوسطهم اسمه غيفارا
كبرهم ثائر في الضفة يا كلّ العالم فلتعلم ...
أطفالي اليتـّم زرعوا الحقل وروداً حمرا
حصدوا الحقل سنابل خير أطفالي وامرأتي وأنا أصرخ ..
نصرخ فليمس وطني حراّ فليرحل محتلي يا كل العالم فلتعلم ..
وطني مسبيٌ لكني الطلقة وحجارة
أطفال الضفة كالطلقة كالمدفع هل تسمع ..
لينا كانت طفلة تصنع غدها لينا سقطت
لكن دمها كان يغني للجسد المصلوب الغاضب
للقدس ويافا وأريحا للشجر
الواقف في غزة للبحر الميت في الأردن
للجسد الغاضب في الضفة …
يا نبض الضفة لا تهدأ
أعلنها ثورة حطم قيدك إجعل لحمك جسر العودة

Raje3 Raje3 yet3ammar raje3 Lebnan

الشمس تأكل لحمهم
لكنهم يعاندون الشمس
من بطون الأرض يطلعون
من عيون الشمس يطلعون
من وجه القمر
إنهم جنوبيون
يزرعون الحبّ والسنابل
والتبغ والرصاص
و يكدحون فقراء يكدحون
فليلهم طويل ودربهم طويل
لكن في عيونهم ألف انتقام وألف الف لعنة
على الكلاب الفاجرة متآمرة هذه الكلاب الفاجرة ..
يعانقون الرفش والمعاول وأخمص الخلاص
ويزحفون للحقل يزحفون فحقلهم
يموت وزهرهم يموت
لكن في دمائهم لون الحياة
إنهم جنوبيون

Dying to live

Frankenstein

reading this book comparing it with reality u will sure come up the same feelings the creature did which is
finding ur self in extreme new environment with mutual feelings
you will have to be affected ,ur whole personality will be depending on ur observation..
learning that one mistake will blow up ur life the only chance u have is to barry ur self alive!!
because of the multiplication of attitudes that came as a result of the single stupid mistake ,will lead to a revenge from the other side that for sure will lead u to a self destruction method
!!!!!!!!


so true
!!!

Its a new Day

it a new life..
its a new day
i wanna succeed in this step
wish me luck
:hug:

يامن يعانق دنيا

يامن يعانق دنيا لابقاءلها
يمسي ويصبح في دنياه سفاراً
هل تركت لذي الدنيا معانقة
حتى تعانق في الفردوس أبكارا
إن كنت تبقي جنانا تسكنها
فينبغي لك أن لا تأمن النارا
احفظ لسانك عما لا يليق به
وارع الاقارب والاهلين والجارا
وقل لعينيك غضي الطرف واتقدي
من نظرة حلال الله اسوار
واعلم بانك من طين إذا جمحا
للكبر نفسك كن للأصل ذكارا
واحسن الظن في من انت تعرفه
وابحث عن الصدق ان اوتيت اخبارا
وارفق بنفسك منها لا تكن رجلا
يسير خلف هواه اينما سارا
فان حاباك اله الكون مرحمة
فذلك الفوز لا كم نلت دينارا

My Dream

weird :|
All the people i miss..
all the people i love..
all the people i wish i can c and hang with like the old days
weird u r all away !!
it was funny and nice to c u again!!
i miss ur presence in my life..
i dont know why All of u joined me in this Dream ..
it was like the best dream ever
seeing such a dream leads me into one conclusion..
that is i miss u all..
i wish i can have u back..
and i know that someday i will c u
i miss u all

Palestine

enjoy the beauty..

Stupid People!

leash heek ento ? :(

!!!!!!

2 much for one day hah?:D

mawdoo3 jdeed

la3yoon lasto :p

mission impossible 10!

ya````````````77777777777777777777777777777777777777777777777
horrible day .....
getting the MRI,,, trying to understand the results,, something talks about a mass!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
and yet el doc is in vacaaatiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiioooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooonnn

damn damn daman kont 3ala 2a3sabi

so,,trying to search the internet for the key word
the first result was a Brain tumer !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i felt helpless walla
i was staring at the monitor i couldnt believe
so mais ran for help she asked a member of a public forum

and he explain that it was nothing actully :P

oh my godd that was the moment i cant forget ever !!!
why do i always like to put my self in such situation couldnt i just wait to talk to the Doc!!!
MAis & Dana i love u r great friends
real friends
mais wallahi konte mar3obeh aktar mene
lan ansa laki haza al mawqef ya bet
And dandoon mish 7ana wa2fetek ma3i abdan :hug:

:\

Brain MRI

that was not a feeling...
damn this feeling...
this box gives u the feeling that u r in grave only u have lights inside
loud voices
u want to move ..but u cant,, hard and stupid
15 min while thinking am i gonna die here or what..
and if i did die here no one will come to help they cant enter this damn room
the last 10 min was like hell
my head was on fire.. letraly strange pain :S
for a sec i though that the machine broke down and there was a real fire bas i couldn't move to check


i hate it
i hate ittttttttttttttttttttttttttttt

Fastlink Fastlink Fastlink

really 3endhom qudra yerfa3o da`3tak be thawani :S
the bill increases every sec .. litrally
really
7ata law el line mafsool
still
kol sec bezodo 3alek el fatora
men weeeeennn
allah be3lam
it increased from 60-90 in 5 days though el `7at mafsool
strange :
bas still true :

shall i accept?
or am i punishing them by punishing my self
dunno

depression depression depression ..
can i just enjoy one minute in peace
really i cant enjoy anything
even stuff i used to love.. i just cant have back the feeling of enjoyment
i wish i can cry loudly
i want to scream for help
i wish i can find some one to reveal my pain or even feel my pain ...
am just a lonely person with 1000 people around..
why i just cant keep my mind clear
amm allwayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyss needyyy
please reveal my pain

i just miss u ...
I miss that town
I miss the faces
You can't erase it
you can't replace it
I miss it now
I can't believe it
So hard to stay
So hard to leave it

If I could I relive those days
I know the one thing that would never change......

Every memory of looking out the back door
I have a photo album spread out on my bedroom floor
It's hard to say, time to say it
Goodbye, goodbye

dont i love u :D